In those moments in which we feel unable to move forward, it is very easy to look for excuses: “my job is not going well because my boss doesn’t appreciate me”; “I want to reduce my consumption of junk food, but I am going to order a double portion of French fries because I was craving it”; “I do not open my own company because I am not able to manage it”, “I do not find the motivation to exercise”, etc. Does it sound familiar?
There is a popular phrase that I really like and that sums up this self-sabotaging behavior perfectly: “get out of your own way.” Many times we are our biggest enemy, because we have negative habits that prevent us from achieving what we want. The worst thing is that we almost always do it without realizing it, and we end up disoriented, without knowing why we cannot move forward.
What are those harmful habits and what can you do about them?
- Procrastination: which is postponing our obligations over and over again, unjustifiably. To deal with this habit, I always recommend setting small daily goals and writing them down on your daily planner. Plan your day in detail. At some point something unexpected will come up, and your plans will change. Just try to fulfill it most of the days. At night you will feel very satisfied and calm that you have reached your daily goals.
- The abuse of food, pills or alcohol: which hurts the body and mind. In these cases, it is necessary to understand why you do it, look for healthier alternatives to meet that need and avoid any person or situation that encourages you to consume them. In case of addictions, I suggest seeking specialized help from a doctor, a nutritionist, or support groups.
- Excessive dependence on third parties to do anything: It is very important to create strong bonds with those around us and that always generates a certain level of dependency. However, if everything you want depends on someone else (be it your family, your boss, your friends, your partner), your journey can become very slow or can even stop. Think about the things you can control, and make them as your priority to focus on.
- Avoid that little destructive inner voice that tells you that you are not capable: that you are not enough, that you are going to fail. This represents our deepest fears from traumatic events in the past and will always be there. But if you recognize it, you can speak to it: “I know where you come from, but look at all that I have achieved, that is, yes I can, yes I am capable and you are not going to stop me.” Starting today, stop sabotaging yourself and help yourself. If you want more advice to live with peace and happiness at any age, find me on my social networks (@lauraposadalifecoach).